Ways to help your children process trauma gained during the pandemic

Many health experts are worried about the impact of prolonged stress on children since the pandemic began. That is why so much effort has been placed on helping kids cope with this stress.

Now, kids are trying to get back to normal by picking up their routines once more. Nancy Dauphinais is a mental health expert with the David Lawrence Center and says it is important for adults to recognize COVID-19 as a life-changing event.

“Some of the losses that our kids have experienced through this pandemic are permanent. There are milestones that they may have been looking forward to for a long time that they won’t be able to experience again,” Dauphinais said. “Things like graduations, and prom and scholarship opportunities and other types of things that weren’t the way that they had expected. And those won’t necessarily ever come back.”

Dauphinais explains how talking with children is the key and that letting children air out their grievances can help them process their feelings. This also helps them restructure what has happened in their lives.

“Sometimes there’s big “T” trauma, which may be a death of a family member due to COVID. And there are many, many little “t” traumas, and it’s okay to talk about those as well,” said Dauphinais.

Southwest Florida is seeing the demand for children’s mental health services skyrocket. Schools are also working to address this by partnering with parents and caregivers.

“As kids are readjusting, there is a lot of anxiety, stress, suicidal ideation, we’ve seen numbers that we’ve never seen before in our history here,” said Dauphinais.

At times, trauma can barely be visible and could manifest itself as changes in behavior. These changes could include sleep patterns, appetite and socializing. Addressing his issues and changes early on may keep children from crossing a dangerous threshold.

“It’s important to give people permission to talk about whatever feelings are coming up to help normalize those feelings. And it’s okay to talk about that. That there’s no should in this way, it is unprecedented,” Dauphinais said. “We don’t know how one should respond after a pandemic. It’s not happened in our lifetime. So we want to just be really open, supportive, give a lot of grace and patience to whatever’s coming up for people and support them for as long as they need.”

Treating the pandemic as a collective trauma can encourage kids to see solutions as a team effort.

The most important takeaway for parents is to simply be present. Be aware of any changes in your child and don’t be afraid to seek help from a doctor or mental health professionals.